Pete:
This is a niche topic to pick but I think it is good and combines two current subjects. Many members of our class are college athletes, and all of us have been affected by Covid. I am a bit confused what the angle of your paper is, I believe it’s about how Covid has affected athletes, but it needs more fleshing out. There is not a clear argument or point that you’re trying to make but you are listing the problems with things. I think this could be fixed pretty simply by including more diverse quotes that are not only your teammates. You mention other schools so it could be interesting to get other college perspectives. I think it could also be important to include a coaching interview, and maybe even an interview with someone on the Covid council at UNE. Lastly, President Herbert is a good idea. Content wise, your formatting is good but there is some sentence structure that could be fixed. Just read things over for where sentences can be more concise and grammatical errors. Overall, I think you’re on a good track!
Peyton:
Similar to Duffy’s paper, this is on a topic that I knew nothing of; and it makes it that much more interesting for an audience to read. I am an English major myself with a direction into being a writer so something like this was enjoyable to read. There are some sentence structure things I would look into, some sentences I had to reread to understand. Also, we don’t automatically know who Professor Cripps is besides a director, he is an important narrative figure and should have a proper introduction. I also think it’s important to hone in on how this is such a big change for UNE because they are medically based. Lastly, for your quotes, I can see there not finished so some great suggestion would be a literature professor (specifically for their opinion on class elimination), Dean Millen (overview opinion of big department change), and English majors! See how they feel about the changes being made within the program and how it affects them. You’re on the right path to a really good paper, just need some more fleshing out!
